This is a question I get asked a lot: why do you want to be a nurse? I never know what to say, because words can't really explain why I know God called me to the field of nursing.
From my earliest memories, I have always been super passionate about helping people. I have a picture of my cousin and I when I was maybe three or four with a toy stethoscope trying to listen to her heart, so I guess it was kind of inevitable.
If only it were that easy! It was a long and winding road before I ended up where I am. I thought I wanted to be an engineer or a high school physics teacher, so I started out down the path to do both. I was going to get my associates in science, and then transfer to a school where I could double major in physics and mechanical engineering with a minor in secondary education. I could have my education degree to fall back on if my engineering career didn't work out, or I could go the teaching route initially, with my engineering degree as a fall back plan if I wanted a change of pace. I thought I had it all planned out.
That was, until I started college. I took calculus-based physics for engineers, or something like that, and calculus II my first semester of college. I know, it was crazy. I had no idea what I was getting myself into. I was good at physics and calculus in high school, so I can do this too, I told myself. But boy was I wrong.
I cried, I prayed, I studied, I almost gave up. I asked God to close the door for me if teaching wasn't where he wanted me to be. He closed it, and that was that. I was so confused and didn't know where to go. I thought "maybe I can still be a teacher, just not high school physics" "maybe I could go to medical school and be a neurosurgeon" (thanks, Dr. Shepherd, I rode that wave for a while), "maybe I could go to PA school and run my own practice," and "maybe I could go to nursing school and deliver babies like my cousin."
My mom sat down with me and we decided that for the next semester, I would take classes that could overlap between nursing and education. That upcoming summer, I would take a class to get my CNA certificate and that would help me decide for the fall semester, which was my sophomore year so I was close to declaring a major.
I remember so vividly the first week of my CNA class when one of my teachers said "all nurses are teachers." That was like a big epiphany, and I remember going home that day so happy and couldn't wait to tell my parents what my teacher had said.
Fast forward a year later, and I was starting my first semester of nursing school. I wish I could tell you this was an easy journey, but I know I can tell you that it has been 100% worth it. I have had patient encounters that have broke my heart, and I've had ones that made me see the good in the world. That's the beautiful thing about nursing.
I have so much happiness and peace knowing I can lay my head down at night and know that I am exactly where God wants me to be and that I am gonna be a dang good nurse.
XO,
Payton